Paper Thin
by Rufwardo
Summary: Danny falls downa hole and everyone's clothes are dissolving!


Daniel has to be trapped in some sort of underground cave. Nobody has weapons, gear, or blush clothes. Just, use your imagination. Jack has to say, 'The things I do for my country.'

Fic challenge provided by SSCarter aka. Boredom

Paper Thin

'So remind me. Why are we standing here in paper clothes, Daniel?' Jack asked, sounding just a little pissed.

'Ahh.' Daniel mumbled, looking at the floor and cleaning his glasses.

'Don't you 'Ahh' me! Answer the question!'

'I too, am curious to know the answer DanielJackson.'

'Teal'c! Don't you start!'

'Daniel?'

'Yeah?'

'Answer the damn question!'

'Fine! We are standing here in the native garb of the Tendel, which just happens to be made of paper, because I ran off to look at something and we all fell down a hole and had to be rescued.' Daniel blushed and ducked his head

'Exactly! See, this is why I tell you not to go running off on strange alien planets. You always get into trouble!'

'Just drop it Jack.'

'Hey guys? Shall we go see if our clothes are dry yet?' Sam jumped in and earned a grateful look from Daniel as the Colonel was deftly sidetracked from his lecture.

'Good idea Captain. Move out people.' They all left the room and headed across a large flat space towards the main buildings. Just as they exited it began to rain. Hard. 'Damn! Hurry it up guys!' They broke into a run.

'Argh!'

'Danny?'

'Down here Jack!' They all looked down and realised that Danny had fallen into a large hole. 

'Looks like an underground cave sir. The ceiling was probably weakened by the rain.'

'That's great Sam, but do you think you could get me out now?'

'Now just hold on Danny. We'll go get our clothes and you sit tight. We'll have you out in no time.'

'Fine. Jack?'

'Yeah?'

'Think you could hurry? Only my clothes appear to be dissolving.'

'Sure. No worries Danny-boy! We'll be back before you know it.' The others headed off to the main buildings.

'Sir?'

'Yes Carter.'

'Daniel's clothes aren't the only ones dissolving.'

'What?' He looked down 'Oh for cryin' out loud! Come on people. Pick up the pace.' They all started to move a little faster. They finally arrived at the main buildings only to find a sign on the doors reading:

Gone dancing in the rain.  
Back soon.  
Have a nice day!

'What? Oh this has to be some sort of huge joke! Carter. Tell me this is a joke!'

'Sorry sir.'

'I believe DanielJackson mentioned to you that these people have great reverence for water. It seems probable that rain is very important to them.'

'Thanks Teal'c. I feel so much better now!' Teal'c just raised one eyebrow.

'So what now sir? All our gear is in the hall.'

'As are our clothes.'

Jack looked at them both.

'Now? Now we go get Danny out of that hole so I can kick his ass for getting us into this mess!'

'Right sir.' They headed back to the hole. Daniel was still sitting there. All his clothes had gone now. As had everyone else's.

'Hi guys! Thought you said you were going to get clothes?'

'We were. Everyone's gone to dance in the rain.'

'They have? This is fascinating! I wonder if it's similar to the Rain Dances of...'

'Danny shut up and help us come up with a way of getting you out of there.'

'OK.'

Well we could always try reaching down and pulling you up. Think you could jump up and grab our hands?

'Jack, I'm down a 15ft hole! I can't jump that high.'

'All right, all right!'

'We could go and find the Tendel sir. Ask if they could let us into the hall to get our gear. Then we could throw Daniel a rope and pull him up.'

'Good plan Captain. You go find those guys, me an Teal'c'll stay here an' keep Danny company.'

'That's OK Jack. You could go. We could try and get them to let us send a team back here later on. The culture looked fascinating!'

'Fine! Teal'c, you stay here. Carter and I'll go check out the native dancing. The things I do for my country!'

'Thanks Jack!' Jack and Sam move off in search of the Tendel. The appeared a while later with no aliens but wearing giant leaves and carrying something that looked like long strands of vine.

'Well?'

'No luck Daniel. These alien guys sure know how to hide!'

'We did find an indigenous plant with long trailing vine-like stems. We reckon that if we weave them together we can make a rope and pull you out.'

'Great!' The three at the top sat down and began the long, tedious job of weaving the vines to make a strong enough rope that would reach down to Daniel. Meanwhile, at the bottom of the hole, Daniel set about making replacement clothes with the leaves and vines that Jack threw him. Soon he had made clothes for everyone and was experimenting with the idea of trying to make actual trousers. 'So, Jack? Want a pair of trousers or is what you've got good enough?'

'What?'

'Well I've got to do something! How is the rope coming along anyway?'

'Just a few more feet to go then we'll be there.'

'Great! So how about it? Want trousers or not?'

'I think I'll wait to get my own back thanks.'

'OK. How about you Sam? I could try and make a hat or something if you'd like.'

'Daniel?'

'Yes?'

'How about you just let us get on with making this rope. We've almost finished.'

'OK.' Soon the rope was finished and they lowered it down to Daniel.

'Just grab onto that and we'll pull you up, OK?'

'Sure.' Daniel did as he was told and soon he was standing up on the surface with his team. 'Thanks guys.' 

'No problem. Now lets go see if the Rain Dance has finished.' They all headed over to the main buildings. The doors to the hall stood open and a welcoming fire burnt in the centre of the room.

'Ahh! There you are. We have been waiting for you.' An alien ran forward to meet them. 'Come in, come in.'

'Thanks. So can we have our gear back?'

'And our clothes?'

'Ah, yes. Your clothes. There was a problem with that. We are unused to such fabrics here and I'm afraid that the washing process has altered your garments.'

'Altered. How?' Jack sounded decidedly suspicious.

'I'm afraid that they have shrunk. All you other equipment has been cleaned and is ready for you. However, the garments you were wearing will no longer fit you.'

'Fine. Danny, you are so dead when we get back!'

'Yes Jack.' Daniel looked at the ground, a blush colouring his cheeks.

'Thanks for your hospitality but if you don't mind we should be getting back.'

'Of course. Please feel welcome to return. We would gladly accommodate you should you wish to spend more time here.'

'Thank you. OK everyone gear up and move out. The General'll be waiting for us.' They made their way back to the Stargate with out incident and were soon on their way home. They stepped through the gate and were greeted by the barely suppressed sniggers of the armed guard on the other side.

'SG-1. Welcome back. Would you mind telling me what you're wearing and what happened to your uniforms?'

'Well sir, It's like this...'

THE END 


End file.
